DIARY OF A FLOPPING FISH

The truth is that the people who are doing bad things are very good at it. We can’t be too hard on ourselves for “falling for it” because, frankly, they lied to us, and we didn’t find out until we were trapped. We get trapped emotionally, financially, and sometimes even physically. Statistics show that most victims of domestic violence end up going back to their abuser.

At the very basic level those services are that your boundaries are respected, and your thoughts are heard. If there is no respect for boundaires, and poor listening then there is no kind of therapy happening.

We never really know what we’re capable of until we’re in the situation. Sometimes it’s great to still be surprised with yourself, but if you’re someone living with high anxiety there is nothing worse than the unknown.

CPTSD is just something that is in my way, and every day I chip at it a little bit more because I will not let it control me and dictate the course of my life.

What has become apparent to me while doing this research is that PTSD on its own is not what causes any of these conditions, but much of it is ruled by our everyday decisions to either show up for ourselves and take care of our bodies, or not.

I hate to be a drag, and I know that it’s supposed to be a cheery time, but honestly it is stressful and sad. As we all do, I try to hold on to the good things about the holidays and let them make up for all the bad.

Getting Old Is Easy The closer I get to forty, the more I start to reflect on my life. As much as I want to be proud of how much I have overcome, I still can’t shake the feeling that I have been robbed. It may be more apt to say that I go back […]

Our brains don’t consider creativity to be a survival tool I have taken an accidental hiatus from writing this blog lately, and I hope this return post is not too disapointing, but I feel it is a good time to explore why it is just so hard to get anything out. In my previous article […]

On the contrary, we tend to stick around with the devil that we know, and the devil that we know is aware that they have the power in a relationship because they know an open wound when they see one.

Unfortunately, the more I read, the more I realize that our traditional American diets are very much the problem with our health. The assembly line of processed foods made food cheap but dying easier.

I think it should be pretty obvious by this point that I have a bit of a spiritual connection to any garden or plants I may be caring for. I want a herb garden in my window year round, and I want a vegetable garden that produces enough to can and share with family. Of […]

The process of healing feels like watching plants grow; progress is slow and all you want is the fruit that comes at the end.

I wake up every morning around 5:30 AM to a chorus of all my life’s worst moments and my inner voice being a complete $#@%. This morning anxiety takes hours to snap myself out of which destroys large chunks of time that was supposed to be for chores or work.

How far is far enough away to escape the past? I am further away now from the place of my birth than I have ever lived. I wish could say it was an entirely pleasant journey, but it was more of a flight.

Part of the reason why recovery is so hard is because it requires us to completely rewire ourselves, change all our habits, overcome things that we didn’t even know were a trauma response.

While the reasons may vary, the damage caused by emotional manipulation may last longer than the abuse.

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder is not an easy disorder to deal with for the person that suffers from it or the people that are around them. This does not mean to lose heart because there are many different paths to healing available, however, the road is not paved.

Emotional validation is the basis on which we all use to feel secure in being ourselves and expressing our feelings. It can form us into confident people or drive us towards codependent tendencies. It determines whether relationships of all kinds thrive or fail. The lack of it forms the basis for gaslighting and the effects contribute the crime rate of society. So, what is it, and how can we become better at it?  What is Emotional Validation? Emotional validation is attem

We look at the news and see war, famine, and police brutality. It is clear that the world is in pain yet we are all too small, too insignificant, to do anything about it. We’re told to focus on the things that we can control as the other route will eventually drive us mad. One by one we all end up looking at some form of self-help so that we can improve ourselves to get rid of those terrible qualities that we saw in others. Many times, we are reacting to something in others t

Much of the reason why it is so hard for me to write this blog or do any of the other creative things I enjoy, is that I suffer from Impostor Syndrome. It doesn’t matter how many English classes I’ve taken, or how much research on the subject I’ve done, I will always feel like a phony. Below I am going to take a look at how this syndrome affects the lives of those who suffer from it, and if there’s any hope to overcome it. Imposter Syndrome is the feeling that you’re not qual